Wednesday, September 25, 2013

New Hope

    It's a new day! New possibilities. New opportunities. A chance to re-write yesterday's mistakes. Failures. As much as I want to sleep in most mornings, I have to admit, the beauty of the sunrise brings a hope. It's the closest thing to erasing whatever you would rather not remember from yesterday. And there are a few "yesterdays" in my life I have needed that hope.
   This morning, my two older girls have been doing their "make-up" and prancing around like ballerinas...and monsters. They pose for pictures after their masterpieces are completed, their little lips and eyes smeared with blue. They are beautiful. They want to be beautiful. Cailee's first words are, "Let's send the picture to Daddy." Alia chimes right in, "Daddy will think we are sooooooooo (twirling around the table) beautiful." I agree and take more pictures, most blurry from their excited movements not being able to be caught on camera.
  I sit on the floor, an audience of one, as they perform various songs, dances and poses. Their confidence soars as I applaud them and I see little smiles tug at the corner of their mouths. Proud that mommy sees their beauty. Confident that I recognize how wonderful they are. I make a point to tell them that they are beautiful with or without their makeup. They don't know that in fact their makeup makes them look a little silly. Colors where there shouldn't be, globs that didn't get rubbed in. But they tried and to mommy, they couldn't look more beautiful.
   As I watched them move in and out of the room, I began to see myself in their poses and hear myself in their words. "I am soooo beautiful!" How many of us want to see ourselves as beautiful and to know that others appreciate our beauty? How many of us try and yet end up with a mess on our hands?
   I know there are days where I fail. Moments each and every day actually. Like yesterday. My two older girls went to Mamaw's house so I could get some rest (and my hopes were to atleast get the laundry put away) However, the baby had different plans in mind. She let me know those plans all day long and I ended up on the couch just holding her and trying to ignore the growing pile in front of me.

  Often times, we try our hardest to cover all our bases, get everything done, and yet we just can't. The laundry pile grows. There are attitudes in our toddler. The baby isn't sleeping. The dinner isn't ready. Whatever it is you are trying to do just isn't happening. You are keeping a lot of plates spinning but some just can't stay up and even end up breaking on the floor.
  What are we looking for? Approval in spite of our flaws. Someone seeing the beauty in us and what we are doing. Applaud and encouragement that causes us to move forward, even dance, and smile in confidence. We all may have more years in us than my 3 and 4 year old but inside, we want to be seen as beautiful. And there is someone who does.
   Just like my little girls wanted their Daddy to see their made up faces and call them beautiful, we have a Father in Heaven who sees our attempts at whatever it is we are trying to do. Even when we are successful at checking off the "to-do-list", our attempts at beauty probably look something like my daughters' blue smeared makeup. But what is amazing is that even with our smeared eyes and lips, even with our mistakes, failures, He lovingly looks down and says, "You are beautiful." I get a little tug on my lips just knowing that ;)

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